No, rape doesn’t ruin your life neccessarily

I have been raped twice and the first time it was society’s perceptions of how awful rape is and that it ruins someone’s life that made me think of it in such a devastating way and almost end my life in a way in which I would never come back from the suicide attempt before I ended up in the psych hospital.

But no, rape hasn’t ruined my life; I now have a very healthy sexual relationship with my darling boyfriend and thanks to great therapy I have incredibly minor PTSD .

Also, I am still the strong and determined person I have always been and I am determined to become a successful professional.

Yes, this is not without discounting the many suicidal attempts I have had, most probably directly caused by my last rape which I haven’t had therapy on in 2016 but now I am overdose free and happy.

Feminism, Uncategorized

A Response to ‘Women Against Feminism.’

Every time someone says to me, “I am not a feminist but…” Or that they believe in equality but not feminism I think, but what about the feminists who fought for you right to vote, work, go to school and university and to be seen as the same as a man in the eyes of the law? If you enjoy possessing your rights as a woman don’t tell me you aren’t a feminist because those two things contradict each other.

This is a great blog post. She has expressed pretty much what I wanted to express except I would have focused more on the fact that the battle is still very far from being won in the Western world regarding violence against women and the overriding lack of justice, pregnancy discrimination, discrimination against women as they move higher up the career ladder, street and online harassment, objectification and sexualisation of women etc.


Imagine this:

The year is 2014. You are a white Western woman. You wake up in the morning in a comfortably sized house or flat. You have a full or part-time job that enables you to pay your rent or mortgage. You have been to school and maybe even college or university as well. You can read and write and count. You own a car or have a driver’s licence. You have enough money in your own bank account to feed and clothe yourself. You have access to the Internet. You can vote. You have a boyfriend or girlfriend of your choosing, who you can also marry if you want to, and raise a family with. You walk down the street wearing whatever you feel like wearing. You can go to bars and clubs and sleep with whomever you want.

Your world is full of freedom and possibility.

Then you…

View original post 1,400 more words

Blog Post, Feminism

This Is My Body And I Will Do Whatever I Want With It

This Is My Body

This is beyond awesome and probably the best feminist video I have ever seen. It is incredibly empowering to see many other women strongly and assertively asserting our rights.

My body is mine and I will do whatever I want with it. You have no right to slap my arse or do anything to me without my consent.

My body is mine and I will be the one to decide if anything sexual happens or how far things go. No one has a right to ever expect sex from me just because I am a woman with a vagina.

I have a right to cheap birth control and if I choose to use birth control that does not make me promiscuous.

My body is mine and I will kiss as many people as I want. I have a right to do whatever I want with my body without facing the double standards of sexual morality and being called ‘slut’/’whore’ when boys are called players.

My body is mine and it deserves to always be treated with respect wherever I go no matter if I am drunk, sober, on drugs or whatever. I have the right to live free from violence and abuse and to not be taken advantage of.

I have the right to walk down the street without facing wolf whistles and men screaming abuse and leering at me out of their cars. No one has a right to treat my body like an object.

I have the right to abortion without providing any reason for it and no woman should ever have to provide a reason because there are many reasons but at the end of the day a woman has a right to choose what happens to her body and if she wants to have a baby or not.

My body is mine and I have the right to decide if and how much I shave my body hair. I also have the right to choose if I wear makeup or not and if I straighten or dye my hair or not.

It has taken me a while but recently I have stopped waxing/shaving my legs because the only reason I do it is because of the social rules we comply with and in order to attract men.

I used to straighten my hair a lot because of all the messages we get from the media about wavy/fluffy/frizzy hair being bad and ugly. Well, fuck that. I hardly ever straighten my hair any more but wavy and fluffy hair is just as beautiful and I refuse to succumb to the fucking patriarchal hair styling police.

I have the right to dye my own hair and wear as little clothing or as much clothing as I like and not be harassed because of it or called a slut just because I am wearing a back showing and leg showing dress. I once had a guy scream “slut” at me when I was wearing a short dress.

My body is mine; no one has a right to tell me what to eat, to not eat something or to diet. My body is not personal property and it is not something that I need to conform to society’s ridiculous beauty standards. Fuck being unhealthily bony thin and having to have breast implants, I think I will stick with trying to stay healthy for my shape and having a balanced diet and a healthy exercise regime.

My body is mine and I will never let anyone tell me what to do with it. I have the right to do what I want with my body without any questions or criticism from anyone.

creative writing, Poems, Poetry

The Sensitive See Pandora’s Box

Sensitive skin
Prone to eczema and rashes.
Sensitive soul
Desires world equality and justice.
Sensitive heart
Intensely cherishes her friends and relatives.
Sensitive singer
Experiences the emotion of her song.
Sensitive art
Lives the raw suffering of the world and poet
And the true feelings of the heart.
Sensitive mind
Is extremely overwhelmed by every everyday emotion
Which strangles the sensitive soul.

Blind sensitivity
Is neither Dr Jekyll nor Mr Hyde.
Neither Judas nor Jesus.
The sole choice of sensitive mind
Is to find a way to tolerate the struggles of sensitive soul
And the pains of sensitive heart
Through the lull
Of poetic art
And world change.
Otherwise the sensitive will fall-
The contents of Pandora’s box are a lethal,
Ugly thing to see each time you walk.

Copyright © C.M.H July 2014

creative writing, Feminism, Human Rights, Poems, Poetry, Sexual Violence

Struck By The Inhumanity Of Hunanity

I was struck again by the inhumanity of humanity
As I read about India’s honour culture’s perpetuation of rape.
A brutal, traumatising eye
For a brutal, traumatising eye;
An innocent fourteen year old raped
To punish her brother who raped
Inhumane humanity;
Until honour crimes end and perpetrators are brought to justice
The inhumanity of humanity will continue.

I was struck by the inhumanity of humanity when I read
About the abused child bride
Who poisoned her husband and relatives
In order to escape.
Inhumane humanity;
Until the terrible practice of child marriage and abuse ends
The inhumanity of humanity will continue.

I was struck by the inhumanity of humanity when I read
About a Pakistani woman stoned to death
For marrying the love of her life.
Or the Syrian woman recently stoned to death
For adultery.
Jihadists in Syria caused her death.
The double standards of morality;
Cheating women,
And eloping in love women
Stoned to death
But never their lovers.
Inhumane humanity;
Until this barbaric injustice of stoning ends
The inhumanity of humanity will continue.

I was struck by the inhumanity of humanity
When I read that the consent and relationships education law
Did not go through
And I looked at the statistics:
Do the 1/3 of British teenage girls who have experienced sexual violence by a boyfriend,
The 400,000 sexually assaulted
And the 85,000 raped not matter?
Is it not concerning that 50% of British boys and 30% of girls think that domestic violence and rape are okay?
Do we want to encourage men to rape and traumatise our girls and women?
If so let’s continue not teaching our children about consent and sexual and domestic violence.
Inhumane humanity;
Until rape and sexual violence are no longer trivialised, a taboo and end
The inhumanity of humanity will continue.

I am struck by the inhumanity of humanity
Because like many I know that two women are killed
By men known to them every week
In England
But no one cares and this is a hushed-up taboo.
People care more about their perceived issue with immigrants than this.
Inhumane humanity;
Until domestic violence is no longer trivialised, a taboo and ends
The inhumanity of humanity will continue.

I was and still am struck by the inhumanity of humanity
When I read for the first time
That between one hundred
And one hundred
And forty million women
Have had parts or all of their clitorises removed,
Their vaginas sewn up.
Female pleasure and sexuality viewed as wrong, awful, dangerous
And women just walking dolls for men
Waiting to have sex with men
Who are their husbands.
Inhumane humanity;
Until Female Genital Mutilation is no longer practiced, is punished by law and ends
The inhumanity of humanity will continue.

Until the inhumanity of humanity ends
I will raise my voice every day of my life against the inhumanity of humanity
And fight for a better world
Closer to the equal, fairer, ideal world
I envision.

Copyright © C.M.H July 2014

Blog Post, Feminism, Human Rights, Uncategorized

To Everyone Who Tells Me I Can’t Change The World

I am an active human rights activist. By that I mean that my MP knows me and now replies to my emails and letters with “Thank you for again taking the time to write to me”. I have also written to David Cameron, Nick Clegg and signed millions of petitions, taken thousands of pledges and have had the intention to protest on a number of occasions except something has normally got in the way. Anyway, as you can see I like to take action and I genuinely feel like my purpose is to change the world because I care so much about causes.

It really infuriates me every time someone says something such as “But will that really make a difference?” or something like that. History has proven on so many times that change is possible, just look at the example of the suffragists and suffragettes in England. If they had not fought so hard for the vote for women we probably would not have it now and although at the time giving women the vote was such a controversial and absurd thing nowadays we would think it very strange, backwards as well as being a human rights violation to take away the vote for women.

Stop telling me that I will not make a difference and I cannot change the world. I may not necessarily eventually become like Malala Yousafzai but if many people change similar things locally we can eventually change things nationally and vamp up the pressure and change attitudes and even eventually change things internationally. For example, today as I have already posted my head teacher has replied to my friend’s letter about consent and relationships and has decided to implement the subject as part of the school curriculum and is taking it seriously. This may just be one school but if other people do the same thing, and my friend said that her friends are thinking of doing the same thing then we can create change on a greater scale and change attitudes so that more people want to campaign about this.

Feel free to continue to tell me that I will not make a difference and can’t change a lot of the things that I want to change and I will just be more determined to prove you wrong. Unfortunately the world and even Western society is so far away from how I want it to be and I am determined to make the world a fairer and more peaceful place where there are no humans rights violations. Obviously this will not happen over night and even if I can help pave the way towards a world where people are treated a lot more equally and not discriminated against based on sex, race, religion, sexuality, class, age, disability etc. that will be enough for me. I guess I am going to have to go into politics in order to have the most impact.